I Love You. I see your struggles and I want you to know that you are beautifully amazing. I'm impressed with your stubborn tenacity to not sink like the stone in your inner self, to find the strength where none is apparent in order to start kicking your way towards the crisp air and out of the swamp that repeatedly threatens your peace and your Life. I hear the lies that you tell yourself - that you don't deserve any sort of happiness because you know you are flawed - and I understand that your pain is great. I want to envelope you in my arms and hold you in my heart and tell you that I Still Love You. I want to stroke your hair the way Mom has done while your tears dry on your soft cheeks and refuse to stop leaking out of your swollen and sore eyes. When strangers first return your smile, notice your arms and then grab the hands of their children and flash your scars a glance of fear right before shooting your still smiling face a look of contempt, I want to place your heart in a cloud that cannot be reached by more pain born out of misunderstanding. I want you to know that I understand your motives and I know that you have never desired to pass your pain on to anyone else. I want you to know that I don't even need to understand your motives in order to Love you and accept you in your entirety. I Love You. Period.
When you feel too weary to go on but don't know which extended hand to reach for - which one can hold the weight of your memories and the honesty of your perspective? Which one will be retracted just after you summon that last bit of trust and take the leap as high as you can, leaving you to fall further down the hole of darkness, other hands now even further away and even less strength to reach them? Whose words can you believe when your own spoken truths are only as real as the moment in which they are uttered? Who will never abandon you, or be unavailable to you when you need them? Who will always be interested in your Life, in your Love, in your Ideas and your Fears?
I will, my Lovely one.
I will never leave you. I will always care. I will always be in love with your mind, regardless of how many times you change it or are angry with it or wish to escape it or try to do so. I will always know that you are amazingly beautiful, and I will always be here to help you through your struggles and your accomplishments - and I will always KNOW the amount of effort that you make in order to be the amazingly beautiful soul that you are. I will continue to be astounded and impressed with that stubborn tenacity and I want you to know that.
You are Perfectly Imperfect and you Always will be.
Love,
~Q~
